Love Came Down and Rescued Me

Have you ever felt like you're just not measuring up? Do you ever feel like you will never be or do enough? Do you keep making the same mistakes over and over and over again? These are feelings and thoughts that I experienced this week (and many times in the past) as I was attending Education Week at BYU. This is a week designed for people of all ages to learn, grow, and be uplifted through classes taught by Latter-day Saints of many different professions. It is basically meant to be a spiritual feast.

I find it interesting that it is times like these, when we are trying so hard to be good and do good, that the adversary will do what he does best and fight with all his might to get us down. Satan really does know how to get to us, so we must always be on our guard. No wonder we are told to "Pray always, that [we]...may conquer satan" (Doctrine and Covenants 10:5). There is so much protecting power in prayer.

The problem with this particular day at Education Week was that I felt like I had already wandered too far and started my day off with too many negative feelings, that it was hopeless. As these feelings continued to build, I felt so discouraged and disappointed in myself. I would have moments of recognizing that these thoughts came from satan, however, that would lead to me being disappointed in myself for following satan, which led me on a continual downward spiral. I share these personal thoughts and feelings because perhaps you are a little bit like me and get down on yourself and feel guilty for every little thing that you are doing wrong or every good thing that you should be doing but aren't doing.

I learned in a class taught by Lee Smith that there are two kinds of guilt. There is crippling guilt, which is when we identify ourselves with our mistakes. This is very dangerous and can cause the downward spiraling I mentioned earlier. There is also liberating guilt, which occurs when we recognize our mistake, repent and rely upon the Atonement of Christ to not just be forgiven, but also to improve and become better. This kind of guilt, or remorse, leads us to Christ, who lifts and frees us from the trapping feelings of despair and discouragement.


Although I am just one in a billion, and was experiencing some pretty normal feelings, my Savior reached down to rescue me from these feelings. I learned something about the mercy and love of God that day. God is waiting for us to come to Him. He wants to lift and strengthen us. He wants to dry our tears and build us up. The very moment we plead for help to get out of the dark spiral we're progressing in, He rescues us and holds us in His warm embrace. The adversary will persist in his tactics and tell us we are unworthy of God's embrace because of the feelings we so recently felt in our heart. But I testify, that God's love is unconditional- He will love us no matter what we do, say, or think. And He rejoices in every soul that comes unto Him, no matter how dark of a place we are coming from.

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf powerfully testified of God's love when he declared:

"Think of the purest, most all-consuming love you can imagine. Now multiply that love by an infinite amount—that is the measure of God’s love for you. 

"God does not look on the outward appearance.  I believe that He doesn’t care one bit if we live in a castle or a cottage, if we are handsome or homely, if we are famous or forgotten. Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly. Though we may feel lost and without compass, God’s love encompasses us completely.

"He loves us because He is filled with an infinite measure of holy, pure, and indescribable love. We are important to God not because of our résumé but because we are His children. He loves every one of us, even those who are flawed, rejected, awkward, sorrowful, or broken. God’s love is so great that He loves even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked.

"What this means is that, regardless of our current state, there is hope for us. No matter our distress, no matter our sorrow, no matter our mistakes, our infinitely compassionate Heavenly Father desires that we draw near to Him so that He can draw near to us" (Conference Report, October 2009, The Love of God).

This is the quote I heard that pulled me out of my despair, because the Spirit whispered to me of it's truthfulness. That is a miracle! That God can reach out to individual hearts and touch them with His all-consuming love. God is love! He loves you with an infinite and intimate love that will never end. If you are struggling to feel God's love, look around you. See the beauty in the world around you, the people around you, and in yourself. And if that's hard to see, pray with all the energy of your heart to have a change of heart, that you might see the beauty of His love that surrounds you! The Atonement enables us to put off the negative, natural thoughts and replace them with thoughts of optimism, hope, and truth. Embrace this beautiful day as an opportunity to come unto the God of love.